


Shattered Cities and Broken Hearts

by TinyFrostGiant



Category: Avengers (2012 film), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (2011 film), Thor-All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Comfort, Family, Fluff, Other, Post-Avengers, Prison
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-14
Updated: 2015-05-14
Packaged: 2018-03-30 11:05:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,982
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3934459
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TinyFrostGiant/pseuds/TinyFrostGiant
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Loki destroyed cities and murdered thousands in his madness, he's finally being taken back to Asgard in chains by none other than his own brother. Now that he's woken from his spell of insanity, Loki must face the consequences of his actions-and a possible execution issued by Odin. As he paces anxiously in his cell, he must deal with the weight of all of the feelings of both what he's done and what his future will be as he awaits his death. Luckily, he's got Frigga and Thor to comfort him, and Frigga will try her best to save her favorite son from the grasp of death. But even the love of family may not be enough to prepare Loki for the lonely days he's got ahead of him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Shattered Cities and Broken Hearts

Shattered Cities and Broken Hearts

            Loki stared uncertainly back at his blonde-haired brother as the power of the Tesseract whipped them back home in a blaze of blue light. The god of thunder stared back at him with equal uncertainty and regret. The muzzled trickster could tell that he was disturbed by what his adopted brother had done. He looked over Thor’s head so that he wouldn’t have to stare his brother in the eye.

The past few days had been a terrible blur, and Loki wasn’t sure what to make of it all. The only thing he knew was that he had killed hundreds of people, been mind-controlled by Thanos, and hadn’t eaten or washed in what seemed like an eternity. If only he could sneak some food out of Asgard’s pantries and take a hot bath as soon as he could once he got home.

            Of course, he wouldn’t be able to do either of those things. With dread rising in his stomach, Loki suddenly considered the thought that Odin might not let him live. After all, what he had done was a monumental crime, and Loki knew how angry Odin would be at him. Loki had assumed that Odin would just yell at him, tell him he wasn’t his son, and throw him into a dungeon for life. The idea of imprisonment and disownment was more than Loki could bear, but what if Odin didn’t want to spare Loki’s life? Loki shuddered as he imagined himself in chains at an execution-the gleam of the axe as it came down on his head, Frigga’s screams, blood running across the floor like spilled wine…

            Loki shook his head and shivered as the gleaming golden city of Asgard came into view. There was no time to fear what Odin had in store for him. He was going to face his father and find out what the cost of his crimes on Midgard would be.

Loki made barely a sound as Thor roughly grabbed his arm and led him across the grounds of Asgard. To Loki’s relief, nothing seemed to have changed, but his relief quickly faded when a group of stern guards approached them and snapped chains onto Loki’s neck, legs, and waist. Loki took a moment to stare at his chains, mentally scoffing at the ridiculousness of it all. How did they expect him to walk when he was bound like a chicken about to be roasted? The gears in his mind sprang into action as he narrowed his eyes and considered what kind of an illusion he could cast to get him out of the chains…

Thor’s deep voice broke into his thoughts before he could figure out how to break his chains. “Don’t even bother, brother. Those chains are powerful enough to bind Surtur himself, and if you attempt to break out of them, you shall taste the glory of my thunder,” Thor rumbled, raising his hammer threateningly above his head. Loki scoffed and rolled his eyes at Thor’s melodramatic threat, but nevertheless fell silent as the group slowly approached the main hall of Asgard. As silly as Thor’s threat was, Loki didn’t want to risk getting electrocuted after the horrible past few days he’d had.

After some time of walking through the enormous castle, the small group arrived in the throne room. Loki held his breath as Odin’s magnificent throne came into view in the vast room. He’d have to watch his step now if he wanted to make it out alive. One wrong move, and Odin would gladly take his head. Loki quietly shuffled into the hall, staring down thoughtfully at the toes of his leather boots as Odin advanced towards him.

The blast that nearly knocked Loki backwards left the trickster’s ears ringing for several minutes afterwards. “YOU HAVE BROUGHT SHAME UPON ALL OF ASGARD WITH YOUR TREACHEROUS SCHEMES!” Odin thundered. “The creature that I once called MY SON has SOILED OUR NAME and wrought war upon AN INNOCENT WORLD! For your crimes, YOU SHALL BE GRAVELY PUNISHED, you snaked-tongued liar!”

Loki attempted to speak, only to have his words drowned out by the metal muzzle. He glared at a nervous servant, who hastily ran up and removed the muzzle so that Loki could speak.

“It’s nice to see that you haven’t changed a bit, Father,” Loki snapped bitterly. He instantly regretted his saucy words when Odin growled loudly enough to make his ears ring even more. Loki winced. He’d forgotten just how earsplitting old one-eye could be. He made a mental note to find something to plug his ears with in the future if he ever had to have another talk with Odin again.

Odin’s unbearable screaming continued, and, if anything, seemed to increase in volume. “For the death and chaos that you have wrought upon Midgard, YOU SHALL NOT BE ALLOWED TO LIVE. You will have three hours until the execution takes place. Until that time, you shall be placed in a guarded chamber and be forbidden from seeing anyone. AND KNOW THIS WHEN YOU STEP UP AND WAIT FOR THE SILVER AXE TO STRIKE YOU-YOU ARE NOT MY SON AND NEVER WILL BE, YOU TRAITOROUS WRETCH OF A BOY!”

Loki shook his head at Odin’s harsh response, although he had fully expected Odin to say this. “But….but Father, I protected you from the Frost Giants,” Loki muttered. “I…I showed you how my brother was not yet fit to rule Asgard. I ruled while you lay in the Odinsleep and we did not know if you would ever wake again. All of this I did for YOU…and yet you claim that I am NOT YOUR SON?”

“SILENCE!” Odin barked. This time, even Thor took a step back. It was clear that Odin was in an unstoppable rage. “Once, Loki, I was proud to call you my son. I thought that one day you would be able to help us unite the kingdoms of Asgard and Jotunheim in peace. I had such hopes for you when I rescued you from that desolate place. I see now that I was wrong about you. YOU ARE NOTHING BUT A LIAR AND A MURDERER, AND YOU HAVE RAINED DESTRUCTION UPON A WORLD THAT HAS NEVER DONE ANYTHING TO DISRUPT THE PEACE OF THE UNIVERSE. For this, son of Laufey, I WILL NEVER FORGET THE FOUL DEEDS THAT YOU HAVE DONE IN THE NAME OF ODINSON!”

“Father, please, do not be so harsh on my brother. He was under the influence of a force that we know next to nothing about,” Thor spoke up.

Loki stared at Thor in disbelief. He’d never have imagined that Thor would ever bother to defend him when Odin was berating him like this. Thor gave him what seemed to be a sympathetic glance as Odin mulled over what his favorite son had said for a minute. Loki wondered if Thor would be able to change Odin’s mind somehow. Would Thor be able to prevent Loki from being executed?

Loki had always been jealous of his brother, but for the moment, he felt a small twinge of gratitude for Thor attempting to spare his brother’s life, despite all of the things Loki had done on Midgard.

Unfortunately for both of them, Odin was not a man who went back on his word. “I am sorry, son, but there is nothing you can do for the man who was once your brother. He is condemned and I am not willing to soften the consequences. He has killed hundreds of people while he was ruthlessly invading Midgard, and I cannot allow him to live. How many more people may die by his hand if we do not erase this threat from our world?”

“But, Father, he is my brother and he is your son. This was not entirely his own doing-there was something else behind this. Loki would never have come up with this idea. He never wanted Midgard, and you know that. I know that. Something else must have used Loki against us. Exactly what, I do not know. But Father, you cannot place all of the blame upon Loki for something that was not his intent,” Thor argued.

Loki remained silent, knowing that now was not the time to voice his opinions. His heart was pounding from fear and anticipation. He knew that there was no way out of this. Odin was not the kind of man who tempered his actions because the perpetrator in question happened to be family. Or at least, considered to be family, since he wasn’t really Odin’s son in the first place, Loki thought sourly.

He heard Odin argue vaguely and tried to follow, but he wasn’t really thinking about Odin’s words. He was thinking about what his mother would think when she found out about his crimes. Loki hung his head, feeling ashamed of his actions for the first time since he had invaded Midgard. He knew that his mother would be deeply disappointed in him. Sure, she wouldn’t yell in his face as his father had, but nevertheless, Loki knew that one glance at her face would be all that he’d need to tell that she was devastated by what he’d done.

Loki tried to figure out how on Asgard he’d explain to Frigga why he’d killed thousands of people and attempted to rule as the king of Midgard. How could he say that he’d been forced by an uncaring titan to track down the Tesseract or else be killed? How could he say that he’d been brainwashed and tormented until he’d broken down and agreed to do it? How could he say that the only satisfaction he got out of the deal was being able to wound Thor by harming the world his brother held so dear? No matter what he said, he’d look like a psychopath. Frigga would think him insane, and she would be mortified to have such a violent criminal as her son.

Loki’s knees suddenly felt weak. He took several deep breaths in order to calm himself, telling himself not to think of Frigga anymore. He had to listen to what Odin and Thor were saying if he wanted to have any shot at wriggling his way out of execution. Tilting his head to one side, Loki listened intently to his father’s and brother’s arguments. There wasn’t anything he hadn’t expected to hear, but it did seem as though his thunderous dolt of a brother might be making some headway in convincing the old man to let him live.

Loki felt that hope might be possible for him until Odin cleared his throat. The king of Asgard’s eye flashed fire, and his snow-white beard bristled angrily. “No, son. There is nothing we can do for Loki now. He has gone far beyond redemption, and the only way we can keep the nine realms safe from his mischief is by making sure he will never harm anyone again. If we keep him imprisoned for life, I am certain he will find a way to escape. I am sorry that I have to do this, Thor, but there is no other option. If there was another way to keep Loki from harming the realms, I would have already done it. But since Loki will only plot a way out if we keep him caged, all we can do is remove him from the scene and hope that no one else comes along to fill his place.”

“But, Father….he’s my brother. Somewhere in there is the boy he was when we were children. Somewhere inside of that creature is the brother who used to play games with me when we were young, who was my constant companion during wars and hunts, who got us out of many a squabble by his tricks. If we keep him alive, there may be a way to get that boy back. But if you kill him, there’s no way of knowing if he can ever return to the man he used to be,” Thor protested.

Odin shook his head. “You heard my words, Thor. Take him to the prison chambers. I will prepare for the execution. I truly regret this, but a king sometimes must make a sacrifice. It is not an easy decision to make, but a king must stick with what he says if he is to be believed by his people.”

Loki let out a scream of desperation and struggled against his chains. Realizing that diplomacy was no longer an option, there was only one thing left on his mind: to escape and find somewhere to hide so that Odin would never find him. Odin waved his hand and a squadron of guards walked up towards Loki. They grabbed him by the arms and tightened his chains until Loki could no longer move. Loki continued to struggle even as the guards gripped him like the jaws of a serpent until he could struggle no more.

Tears streamed down Loki’s pale face as he was forcibly led away from the glimmering throne room. Not only was he going to have to face Frigga’s disappoint, but in three hours, he would be no more. Many in Asgard would watch his decapitation. He bit his lip furiously as he imagined Odin looking on in satisfaction as the axe came down on his head. He resolved to die in as dignified a manner as possible so that Odin wouldn’t be able to enjoy seeing his former son killed.

Loki wondered how he would be able to stand the wait. He’d have preferred to have been killed immediately so he could just get it over with. Now he was going to have to stew about in a prison cell for three hours, worrying and pacing and steaming in anger while Odin arranged for his death.

He’d probably be visited by anyone who had ever remotely cared about him, get berated by them, told what an awful person he was, and be left feeling even worse than he was in the beginning. He was hardly looking forward to it, and he was furious at himself for allowing himself to get brainwashed by the Other and the Mad Titan. If he hadn’t agreed to their hare-brained plans, none of this would have happened.

Although he didn’t notice it at first, Loki found himself struggling to walk in a straight line. He kept stumbling and the guards kept catching him, much to his annoyance. It was only now that he had time to think that he realized that not only was he mentally a mess, but his body had been terribly weakened by both his time in the wormhole and his beating by the Hulk.

Amazingly, he didn’t seem to have broken anything, but his body felt as though it were too weak to function properly. Every step he took seemed a monumental struggle, and his head pounded like a particularly annoying drum. He wondered if he’d even be able to stand by the time he made it to his cell.

It didn’t matter either way-all that mattered was that he was going to die and had failed Odin and Frigga. Nothing he could do now would ever manage to convince either of them that he was a great son. Now, all that anyone would ever see him as was a heartless murderer who had been foolish enough to attempt to conquer Midgard.

Every chance he had had been completely wiped out. Everything he’d wanted was not to be. All of it was the fault of the Other and the titan. If it weren’t for them, Loki might have had another shot at proving himself. Then again, perhaps not-Odin probably had given up hope when he’d realized just what lengths his adopted son had gone to in order to show how worthy he was as a prince.

A piercing scream suddenly filled Loki’s head. He closed his green eyes and shook his head, trying to ignore it. The scream only continued to increase in volume, much as Odin’s shrieking had.

The world around him began to grower blurrier with each passing second. He found himself stumbling and falling towards the ground, and he would have hit his head on the floor if the guards hadn’t caught him at the last minute. One of them said something to him, but strangely enough, he couldn’t hear what the guard was saying. The only thing that filled Loki’s confused mind was how strange it was that everything around him suddenly looked gray.

Loki realized what was happening to him and swore loudly. The guards stared at him strangely, not understanding why Loki had cursed. All that Loki had time to do was mutter, “Guards, catch me,” before his legs gave out on him. The gray completely overtook his field of vision just as his hearing went out completely. The last thing that Loki saw before his vision went out was the guards catching him and starting to drag him along the hallway towards a place that didn’t look at all like a cell.

…………………………………………………

 

For some reason, the ceiling that Loki found himself gazing up at looked terribly familiar to him. He was certain he’d been in this room many times before-he just couldn’t recall where it was or what its name was. He tried to sit up, but the gray started to overtake his vision again. He lay back on the polished bench, trying to ignore the ringing in his ears.

Why he hadn’t just asked the guards to bring him to Asgard’s infirmary in the first place was beyond him. He should have realized that he wouldn’t be able to remain conscious for long after getting beat up by a green monster and then getting yelled at by his father on the same day.

Asgard’s infirmary…Loki smacked his forehead, wondering why he hadn’t remembered it before. Of course! This was the ceiling of the Healing Room. No wonder it had seemed so familiar to him. He’d been there several times to heal after battles and when he was ill.

He should have known that the guards would take him there instead of his cell after collapsing in the hallway. They’d want to make sure that he wasn’t badly injured after what had happened to him. Odin would probably want to have a healthy man be executed, since, as everyone knew, watching a fit man die was far more satisfying than watching an injured one.

Loki’s burning anger returned to him again. He willed himself not to get mad again-he didn’t want to faint for a second time and have half of Asgard think him weak. He needed to lie still until he was absolutely certain that he could walk again without assistance. If there was one thing Asgard hated, it was a weakling.

Loki was already considered a weakling because of his lack of skill on the battlefield and-blasphemous as it was, or at least the Asgardians seemed to think-he preferred to spend his time reading and learning spells rather than drinking and bashing other Asgardians. No, that was his brother’s forte.

If the Asgardians knew that Loki passed out, they’d probably start thinking he was a woman in disguise. Asgardians didn’t have much tolerance for people who weren’t either manly warriors or gentle housewives, as Thor’s training Sif to be a warrior had proven to him. And since Loki was neither, he didn’t want to spread the wrong impression and make himself look even worse than he was sure he already seemed.

A knock on the door interrupted Loki’s thoughts. Although he wanted to get up and answer it, he decided that he wasn’t taking any chances. So he lay quietly through the knocking, which seemed to go on for at least five minutes, before the door finally clicked open and a slender figure entered the room.

Loki’s eyes filled with tears again as he recognized his mother. He shut his eyes and tried to feign sleep, but Frigga wasn’t fooled. “I know you’re not sleeping, Loki,” she whispered as she sat down next to him and stroked his dark, greasy hair.

Loki turned his head away, his cheeks burning with shame. For several minutes, he refused to speak. He was afraid that if he said something, he’d only tell Frigga something that would make her angry with him. Loki was feeling horrible enough as it was, and he certainly didn’t want to turn the only person who still loved him against him.

Frigga continued to stroke his hair and attempted to pry a few words out of her adopted son. She asked him how he was feeling, what had happened in Midgard (Odin apparently hadn’t told her everything), why there were so many cuts and bruises on his face.

Loki wanted to tell her everything-how the Hulk had beat him up, how the Other and the titan had tormented him into invading Midgard, how he really hadn’t wanted to take over Midgard to begin with, how ashamed he was to have failed her and Odin, and how he was terrified of dying-but still he said nothing.

How could he possibly tell her that he didn’t regret anything he had done? She’d raised him to be better than that, and he knew that she probably already had a sense of how he truly felt for his actions.

Loki painfully turned his head and stared at her with watery eyes, silently begging for forgiveness. Frigga’s sad, ancient gaze told him everything-she knew that he didn’t really feel remorse for killing over a thousand innocent Midgardians and she was disappointed in him.

Loki wished he could come up with an excuse to soften the blow of his crimes, but he knew better than to open his mouth. Frigga knew full well when he lied, and after all the damage he’d already caused, the last thing he wanted was to alienate his mother-the only person he knew for sure was still on his side.

Thankfully, Loki didn’t need to speak. Frigga broke the silence for him in her soft, patient voice. “Loki…I know that much has happened to you since we last saw you. I’m sure you don’t want to tell it to us all right now. But I want to know…invading Midgard wasn’t your idea, was it?”

Loki sadly shook his head. Frigga knew him so well. She knew that he had no true ambition as a world conqueror and that someone must have implanted the idea in his head in order for him to behave so uncharacteristically. “No, mother. That wasn’t me,” Loki replied. “That idea…was not mine. It was the idea of a being whom I know nothing about. A great titan forced me to retrieve the Tesseract, or else he would give me a fate more painful than death itself. I had to follow his orders or else I would not be here to answer you.”

Frigga spoke again only after she had considered Loki’s answers. “Did he torture you? You look pale. And that burn on your head…” Frigga shook her head and slowly rose to her feet.

“Where are you going?” Loki asked suspiciously. Was she going to question Odin about the titan? Was the being who had tormented him a dire enemy of Asgard or a keeper of arcane knowledge? He tried to rise to prevent her from moving, but groaned again as his head swam.

“Don’t move. It would not be wise for you to get up after all that you’ve been through,” Frigga advised. She’d noticed that soon after she’d entered the room, Loki had dropped the glamor covering up the most severe of his wounds. Now she could see all of the horrific injuries scattered across his body, and she couldn’t stand to see her son looking so pitiful. When Loki gave her a panicked look, she added, “I’m only going to find a salve for your burn. It’s not right to let you suffer when there’s a cure for your suffering here.”

“Mother, I’m not in pain,” Loki protested. Frigga gave him another look, and Loki knew that nothing he said would appease his mother until his wounds had been cured.

He sighed and flopped back down on the bench as Frigga rummaged around the room. At least no one else was there to humiliate him when he was in such a feeble state. Still, he felt glad that at least Frigga cared enough about his health to try and make him feel better. There weren’t many left in Asgard who would’ve considered his well-being very high up on their list of priorities, especially as of this moment.

When Frigga had retrieved the salve, she gently applied it to the large burn the titan had inflicted on his forehead. When her salve-coated fingers first touched the injury, Loki flinched in pain and screwed up his eyes. Taking several deep breaths, he willed himself to remain still as Frigga continued to coat the injury. By the time she’d finished, however, Loki admitted to himself that the burn felt far less painful than it had felt before.

Frigga continued to dress and bandage Loki’s injuries for a while. Loki was glad, since it meant that he didn’t have to fish for things to say to her. As Frigga healed him, the pain faded from Loki’s body and cleared the clouds of agony from his mind. When Frigga was finished, Loki felt strong enough to triumphantly sit up without seeing gray splotches anymore.

“Thank you,” Loki said softly. He felt Frigga softly ruffle his hair in reply. Smiling, Loki got to his feet, then stopped dead in his tracks. A squadron of guards loomed near the door like a murder of crows waiting to carry him off.

“Do I have to?” Loki said in a plaintive voice like a young child.

“I’m sorry, Loki, but there’s no other option,” Frigga said, shaking her head.

“But…but…you can change Odin’s mind; you’re the Queen after all! Couldn’t you tell him to spare my life?” Loki begged. He still didn’t feel ready to confront death, and he could tell that Frigga didn’t want to see him die, either.

“I’m not sure if I could change his mind or not. I tried several times to convince him to spare you while you were asleep, but he refused to. I…I can’t say any more, Loki. They won’t let me speak to you once they take you to your cell,” Frigga said in a strained voice.

Loki felt hurt by the tears welling in Frigga’s eyes, but he was also furious that Odin would not change his mind. “Please, Mother! You can’t let him kill me! Try talking to him again; he always listens to you! Just please-“Loki insisted.

“I’ve told you: Odin refuses to listen. Once he makes a decision like this, it’s final. You know that, Loki. I’d have given him the sun and the moon if it meant not losing you. But there’s nothing more I can do for you. I’m sorry,” Frigga whispered. She watched sorrowfully as the guards approached Loki, not wanting to see her son taken away from her.

Loki’s face twisted into a rage. Words as sharp as swords burst from his curled lips before he could think. “YOU….YOU GHASTLY FOOL. YOU COLD-HEARTED WITCH! Letting your own son die without even attempting to save his life when you hold the power to do so! Even if Odin changes his mind, I’ll never talk to you again. Traitor! And I believed all my life that you were REALLY my mother!”

The guards slapped a muzzle onto Loki’s mouth before he could speak again. Loki thrashed, but they clapped handcuffs onto him and wrapped chains so tightly around his body that he could barely take a breath without flinching. Loki finally quieted and kept his head down as the guards led him down the hall. He knew that what he’d said had speared Frigga’s heart, and he didn’t want to see the tears running down her face at his cruelty.

He hoped that his death would be quick and merciless. He was beginning to hate himself for what he’d done to his only ally. After being so kind as to talk to him and take care of his wounds when nobody else would, what had he done? He’d called her awful names and denied that she was his mother.

Odin was right. He was an irredeemable bastard who deserved to die. Loki felt with a strange certainty that he’d take as much pleasure in his death as the other Asgardians would.

………………………………………………………….

            The guards shoved clothing into Loki’s arms before unceremoniously pushing him into a changing room. Shrugging, Loki took a quick glance at his new prison uniform before he put it on. It was simple-a brown leather vest; a dark green long-sleeved shirt; some modest pants and shoes-but surprisingly comfortable.

Once he’d finished changing, the guards dragged him to his cell and practically tossed him in before locking up the cell. Loki blinked for a few moments as he took in his new home. It wasn’t exactly the barren rat-infested cupboard that he’d been fearfully imagining, but it wasn’t as lavish as the rest of the rooms in Asgard were. There were a few unadorned tables, an elegantly curved chair and matching footstool, and a plain but comfortable-looking bed.

On further inspection, Loki noticed a small stack of well-worn books on top of one of the tables. Curious, he walked up to the table and scanned the titles on the books’ spines when he noticed a crumpled piece of parchment fall from the table of contents of a dark green book.

Loki picked up the parchment and immediately recognized the neat, curling handwriting: It was Frigga’s. Blushing in shame, Loki read it again and felt even worse than before. Her obviously rushed note read: _Dearest Loki, I am sorry that you must be imprisoned and killed, but I have managed to get Odin to agree to provide you with small comforts during your imprisonment. I have left a few books for you to read in case you are bored before your execution. Know that you still have my love, no matter what horrible things you have done, and that I wish things had been better for you. Be brave. Love, Frigga_

“I’m sorry, Mother. I never meant to call you a witch,” Loki apologized, knowing that Frigga would never hear him. Even after all that he’d done, he was amazed that Frigga still showed him such kindness. He didn’t deserve a mother like her. Well, it didn’t matter anyway. In a few hours’ time, he’d be dead and gone, and she’d be left to proudly watch over her one true son. Thor mattered more than he ever would. Thor would gain the throne, thousands of admirers, riches, and fame. Loki’s life would be no more than an ignominious footnote in Asgard’s centuries-spanning history.

Loki gritted his teeth and forcefully shoved the thoughts from his mind. These were not the sorts of things he ought to be thinking of before his death. Everything was said and done, and he had no control left over the situation. He should simply accept his fate and try to make himself at home while waiting for Odin to prepare his death.

 _That liar probably won’t even give me the dignity of a proper funeral once the dirty deed is done. He’ll deposit my body under a heap of dung in the stables and be done with it,_ Loki seethed. Frustrated, he knocked a book off the table and glared at it as though it were responsible for everything that had happened in the past year and a quarter. Loki then threw back his head and let out a long, disturbing, satisfying scream. The scream encompassed all of the pain, rage, embarrassment, confusion, loneliness, jealousy, envy, and fear that he’d felt for so long now. Now was the time to let it all out so that he could die in peace.

After Loki was finished screaming, he flopped exhaustedly onto the bed and stared blankly up at the ceiling. Now that he’d purged all the emotions that had been niggling at his soul, he had absolutely no idea as to what he should do next. Not that he had a lot of options, anyway. All he could really do in this prison was read the books that Frigga had given him, stew over his fate, pace, take a nap, practice his magic, scream some more, or try to plan an escape. None of those options looked particularly fulfilling to him. He would have tried to escape, but he knew that it was entirely out of the picture-the guards would simply chase him down and bring him back to Asgard, and he couldn’t see any possible way out of the cell whatsoever.

Loki sighed and wondered how Frigga could have possibly imagined that a few books would be enough to keep him occupied when so many other things were flitting about his mind like crazed flies. He knew that she’d had the best intentions in mind, but really, nobody could possibly indulge in a little light reading when they were facing their own death in a few hours.

Well, he supposed it was his only option left. Reluctantly, Loki opened one of the books and did his best to concentrate on the text within, rather than his impending doom.

………………………………

 

Frigga was about at her wits’ end. She’d been arguing with Odin for over an hour now, and he still had no intention of letting Loki out alive. “Frigga, we can’t possibly let this war criminal live any longer. He’s no longer the man you knew. He’s far too dangerous,” Odin presently insisted.

Frigga took a deep breath and concentrated on her next words. She mustn’t let her frustration show through if she was to have even the slightest chance of changing her stubborn husband’s mind. “Odin, I understand your reasons for wanting to execute Loki. All I’m asking for is to look at this issue from a different perspective. I know that Loki is dangerous, and we have to deal with him so he won’t try to harm Midgard again. But do we really need to murder him to eliminate this threat? I know him well; if you try to kill him, he may very well come up with a scheme to escape. And even if you do go through with this, there will always be another enemy. Getting rid of Loki won’t solve our problems. And we know that Loki’s daughter might be able to figure out a way to allow Loki to cheat death. How can we know that if he’s gone for good even if we do kill him?”

Odin looked thoughtful. “I never considered Hel. Now we have a whole other set of problems to deal with,” he grumbled.

Frigga chimed in again, sensing that Odin’s argument was on the verge of crumbling. “Exactly. If we send him off to death, we may just be setting him up to return again even stronger. How do we know that who he used to be is gone for good? We may be able to convince him to help us if we ever need him. I’ve trained Loki in the magical arts since the time he could talk, and he’s told me many times about how he’s helped Thor and the others escape from difficult battles. There may be benefit for you if you decide to let Loki live.”

Odin shook his head and sighed. “I know, Frigga, but the danger that Loki poses to us is greater than any advantage we may have from keeping him alive. If we let him live, worse transgressors may get the idea that Asgard’s king is weak. We cannot have people get the impression that the man on Asgard’s throne isn’t strong enough. Strength is the only way to ensure peace in our kingdom. I deeply regret having to kill your favorite son, Frigga, but I cannot see any other way around this.”

Frigga lowered her head, feeling utterly defeated. She knew as well as Odin that their people came first and that enforcing the law was necessary, even though the laws could be strict. Despite that, though, she couldn’t bear the thought of having Loki beheaded. She’d tried to stay logical throughout the entire argument, but her nerves were fraying and she barely had the strength to hide the tears in her eyes any longer.

Odin noticed Frigga’s sadness and softened. “I understand, Frigga. I would not kill Loki if I had the choice as well. But there is no other solution. I must go through with this, difficult as it is. A king cannot be soft, or else the kingdom will fall to ruins.”

“But Odin, you remember that strength does not solve all problems,” Frigga said, her voice quavering with emotion. “That’s one of the things that Loki does best. I know that times are different now, but do you remember how he saved Thor, Sif, and the Warriors Three by using smoke to cover their escape? He’s saved their lives a thousand times over, even if he has endangered them as many times. If we lose him, we may very well be losing a secret weapon. Strength has its value, but so does cleverness. And if we lose one of our only sources of cleverness, we must rely on strength alone. That may bring us more problems than if we decided to let one source of cleverness stay alive.”

Odin considered Frigga’s words for a moment. She had a point-Loki had proved very useful in protecting Thor and his friends many a time in battle, and Loki had often thought of solutions that the king of Asgard would never have considered. One time, when Odin was debating how best to maneuver his army during a bloody war, Loki had offhandedly mentioned moving the armies in a crescent shape to surround and close in on the enemy. Odin hadn’t thought too much about this at first, but when he began to realize how many lives he’d lost, he decided to take Loki’s advice.

Thankfully for Odin, the plan had worked, although Odin had never given Loki credit for the victory. Who knows what might have happened if Loki hadn’t come up with that excellent suggestion? He may have won, sure, but plenty more lives would have been lost in the process.

Odin nodded. “You have a point, Frigga. Very well then. I will let Loki live, but only on one condition. And that condition is that you may never see Loki again or give him gifts for as long as you both live.”

Frigga smiled, although she inwardly felt crushed. Still, she was willing to do whatever it took to keep Loki alive, no matter how much the thought of never seeing her adopted son again broke her heart. “Thank you, Odin. I respect your decision,” she said softly as she turned and prepared to leave the room. Before she left, she felt Odin place a hand on her shoulder. She placed her hand on his back in turn and kissed her husband on the cheek. She knew that Odin could sense her sadness, and she felt incredibly grateful for his support and that he had decided to spare Loki’s life.

………………………………..

_The origin of the Bilgesnipe has been unclear to Asgardian scientists since ancient times. Some say that this unusual antlered beast hails from…_

Knock, knock, knock.

“Go away!” Loki yelled as the unexpected noise interrupted his reading. Huffing in irritation, he turned back to his book, wondering what sort of a moron would dare to knock on his prison cell while he was clearly occupied.

_The origin of the Bilgesnipe has been unclear to Asgardian scientists since…_

Knock, knock, knock.

The noise sounded more desperate this time. Loki ignored the knocking again, figuring that the idiotic knocker would eventually figure out that he had no time to be answering trivial visitors when he was about to be killed. Besides, he still hadn’t figured out what exactly the origin of the Bilgesnipe was quite yet, and it had been something that had fascinated him since he was a wee lad.

_The origin of the Bilgesnipe has been unclear…_

            KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK.

            Fine. The origin of the Bilgesnipe would just have to wait until later. Loki reluctantly placed the book back on the table before wearily dragging himself to the door of his cell.

            His face twisted into an irritated snarl when he saw Thor waiting outside with a greasy white paper bag in his hand. “Get out,” Loki hissed. “The execution will be any minute now. I don’t want to put up with your idiocy before I leave this world for good.”

            “But Loki, they’re not going to kill you. Frigga talked Odin out of it,” Thor explained, looking hurt.

            Loki blinked and stared at Thor for a good ten seconds. “What?” Loki repeated numbly.

            “I said, Frigga talked Odin out of it. They’re not going to kill you. You just have to stay in jail for the rest of your life,” Thor repeated.

            Loki stood dumbfounded and processed the information a few times in his head before it finally sank in. A question popped out of his mouth before he could stop it. “Will Mother still be allowed to visit me?”

            Thor shook his head. “No, Loki. Frigga agreed to stay away from you because Odin said it was the only way that you’d be allowed to live.”

            Loki, crestfallen, dropped his head and refused to look Thor in the eyes. “But…but…but…I don’t want to stop seeing Mother,” Loki said softly, like a small child. He looked up at Thor desperately, but he could see that Thor was dead serious.

            Loki turned away and wiped tears out of his eyes. This was worse than death. Having to live his entire life without the one person who dearly loved him sounded like torment. “They should have killed me,” he said aloud, forgetting that Thor was able to hear him. “They shouldn’t have let me live. If I can’t see Mother again, I don’t want to live. I care for no one. She was all I had left. Well, if Odin isn’t going to kill me, then I’ll do it myself.” He pulled out a dagger he’d hidden in his pocket and raised it above his head, preparing to plunge the blade deep into his neck.

            “Loki! NO!” Thor called, charging forward faster than Loki could have believed possible. In two seconds, Thor had lunged forward, grabbed Loki by the arm, and thrown the dagger to the far end of the cell so that Loki would never be able to retrieve it.

            “How dare you deny me the only escape left!” Loki growled. He struggled with Thor, biting, kicking, and scratching at him, but Thor held him firm until he no longer had the strength to fight anymore. “Thor…brother…understand me…without her, I have nothing left. What use do I have to you? Am I just…a stolen prize, something…to keep here? And for what? Does Odin have some use for me-as a diplomat between ourselves and the Frost Giants? Or does he wish to torture me? Please, Thor…I have nothing. Staying in this cell will do me no good. Please, please, allow me the only escape I can afford…”

            “I won’t let you, Loki,” Thor thundered. Loki stood still and looked meekly up at his brother with huge tear-filled eyes. Thor softened and loosened his grip on Loki’s wrist. As soon as he did so, Loki attempted to dash back towards his dagger, but Thor grabbed him by the arm again and clung firmly to Loki. “I won’t let you. I know that this must be hard for you. You’ve been through a lot in the past year, and we still don’t know all that happened to you. But I’m not going to let you die. You’re my brother, Loki. I still care about you. I don’t recognize who you’ve become, but I’m not giving up on you. And I certainly will not allow you to die. No matter what you say, I’m still here.”

            Loki stood still and looked at Thor in a feeble but undeniably appreciative manner. He wasn’t sure if Thor still trusted him after the events of New York, but it made him feel good to know that Thor still loved him. He let his arm go limp and turned away from the dagger. “Thank you,” Loki said softly. He hobbled back towards the book on the table and sat down, opening up to the page he’d been on before Thor had entered his cell.

            Just as he had started to read again, Thor tossed the white paper bag onto the table. Annoyed, Loki glared at Thor, silently demanding an explanation.

            “It’s some shawarma. I saved the leftovers for you….we went to get some after we were done fighting you. I felt bad that you couldn’t be there, understandably, so I decided to save the rest of mine for you. And I got you the drink that you asked for. Tony forgot, but I didn’t, and I know how much you needed it after… you know,” Thor explained.

            Loki gave Thor the sweetest smile he’d ever given his brother. “Thanks,” Loki said. He cautiously opened the bag and was accosted with a delicious smell of turkey, lamb, tomatoes, and other delicious ingredients. Loki licked his lips, and his mouth watered madly at the terrific scent. He grabbed the delectable wrap and tore into it with the ferocity of a starved wolf.

In fact, it was only when he had finished with the shawarma that he remembered that Thor had also left a drink for him in the bag. Loki eagerly grabbed the can of beer and glugged it down. He wrinkled his nose at the bitter taste, but since it eased the pain, he finished it with almost as much gusto as he had the shawarma.

            When he was finished, he wiped his mouth with his sleeve and stuffed the bag back into Thor’s hands. “I…I don’t know what to say. It’s been so long since I’ve eaten anything, and that…that was amazing,” Loki admitted.

            The smile that Thor gave him was so bright that Loki nearly went blind from the glint of his brother’s pearly white teeth. That was enough to tell him that Thor appreciated Loki’s comments. Loki smiled back and watched as Thor exited the cell, whistling cheerfully to himself.

            Loki sat there for a while, staring at Thor as he gradually disappeared down the long, narrow hall. As soon as Thor had vanished completely from sight, Loki turned back to his book. He couldn’t entirely concentrate on it, however, because he was considering the fact that being in prison for life might not be entirely awful.

Sure, Frigga wouldn’t be able to see him, but now he knew that deep down inside, Thor still believed in him. After all that they had gone through and all that he’d done to Thor, that was the most powerful thing that Loki could have heard. Living with that knowledge comforted him deeply. Besides, there was still plenty of time to figure out how to escape if he ever grew weary of this bleak confinement.

            Loki turned back to his book and set to work on devouring the next few chapters. He still hadn’t figured out the origin of the bilgesnipe, and for now, that was more important than figuring out how to break out of his cell.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


End file.
